Enjoyment does not depend on what we do, but how we do it. The best moments in our lives are not usually associated with passivity and idleness - rather, they are born when we ourselves exert our body or mind. Every little achievement makes life more enjoyable, richer, more meaningful. It is worth practicing controlling your consciousness to control how you direct your feelings and thoughts.
What is the purpose?
Happiness is not something that falls to us like a medal around our neck. It depends on our ability to interpret. We have to develop, prepare and protect ourselves in order to be able to receive satisfaction in life.
The question is what I want and what SOCIAL norms and society expect from me. How to find common ground? An enjoyable and meaningful life is a form of energy. Energy, of course, can be used for both creation and destruction. The purposes for which energy is used can enrich or destroy our lives. Goals can make life meaningful or meaningless. What are your goals – last year, last week, today, tomorrow?
The pursuit of gratification, that is finding pleasures and avoiding pain, is an encoded reflex in the genes of our species. Can we always choose between reflex, desire and the channeling of psychic energy (spirituality)?
Events such as remembering, thinking, feeling, understanding, noticing, deciding provide real satisfaction. What can we do to improve our well-being and future today? For many of us it has to do with setting goals, even the smallest of them, noticing them developing towards being realised, even small-small steps that hint that they are coming true. Whether a dip in the sea, a coffee with a friend, a walk in the park, a resultful meeting, well-prepared presentation or a neighbour smiling.
How to maintain relationships?
Challenges and skills generally need to be balanced in order to enjoy and maintain social relationships, especially family relationships. The same applies to long-term work relationships. When a relationship, whether work or private, becomes routine and comfortable, it may no longer provide pleasure or support our desire for increasing complexities.
How to keep goals?
Increased complexities? A person is constantly looking for new challenges. So it is with dreams. As soon as you have one dream come true, you will probably enjoy it for a short while, already looking for another dream. Over time, a person gets to know the other person well and the challenge fades.
It is structuring, system and feedback that keeps us going.
For example, matching personal goals with the goals of the company and society. Structuring the mismatch to fit the living environment (self-observation, how to fit in better). Look for examples from your life (e.g. the sea, study abroad, hobby, sports, gardening, automotive industry, etc).
Society's goals grope and push the framework. A person reaches real freedom when he can notice and understand WHY he does something. Why do you do something, do you always know and notice?
A person performs substitute activities in order to fill the gaps in the spiritual experience, so to speak, deficiencies. Such replacement activities can be manifested in eating disorders, dependent relationships, behaviours that conflict with values (lying, hiding, addictions, deviating from the goal).
On feedback.
Feedback gives us information about where we are going and how we are doing. For example, a psychologist and a car repair engineer experience feedback differently at work. It is worth learning to look for and find feedback every day.
Enjoyable experience and noticing.
Our task is to learn to enjoy everyday life and achieve our goals without reducing others' opportunities to enjoy life. It is not so important what happens to us during life, but how we can deal with the episodes. Our happiness should depend on inner harmony and not on how much we can control and influence the forces of the universe. How many things and events happen exactly as we wish? How we feel and the extent to which we enjoy life depends on how our minds filter and interpret everyday sensations anyway.
More on this topic in consulting.
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